Summer is the season of the Fire element in Chinese medicine, a time of full expression, connection, warmth, and joy. Just as summer stretches out its arms in sunlight and blossoms open to the bees, Fire invites us to open our hearts. It governs the Heart, the ‘Emperor’ in traditional Five Element acupuncture, associated not only with blood circulation but with our capacity to feel joy, give and receive love, and experience deep connection.
But what happens when joy is elusive?
The Fire Personality and the Need to Be Loved
People with a strong Fire constitution often radiate warmth, empathy, and charisma. They are naturally attuned to others’ emotions and have a deep longing to connect. But the core of that longing can hold a misconception: Fires have often internalised the idea that in order to be loved, they must be perfect.
This can set up a painful dynamic. Fire types may become hyper-attuned to how they appear, striving to be liked, to never offend, to sparkle, to entertain. But perfection is an impossible standard, and when inevitably they fall short of their own expectations, what follows is not mild disappointment but shame.
Shame and the Fire Element
Shame is, as researcher and storyteller Brené Brown defines it, “the intensely painful feeling or experience of believing that we are flawed and therefore unworthy of love, belonging, and connection.”
And so, we fall into a vicious cycle. Our striving for love and connection seems to push it further away. In trying to be perfect, we isolate ourselves. We start comparing ourselves to others, usually to those we idealise, and of course, we always come up short. Now not only do we feel shame, but also a quiet sense of competition, as if someone else’s joy or beauty somehow diminishes our own. As if we can’t both be loved.
This cycle—yearning for love → striving for perfection → falling short → shame → isolation—is the shadow side of Fire.
The Antidote: Mudita, Joy in the Joy of Others
But Chinese medicine offers not just diagnosis but direction. Within the Five Elements, balance is always possible. And in this case, the medicine lies within the Fire element itself: joy.
Not the performative joy of trying to prove your worth, but a subtler, deeper form: mudita, a Sanskrit word meaning sympathetic joy—the ability to feel joy in the joy of others.
When we practice mudita, something shifts. Instead of comparing ourselves to others, we begin to feel ourselves connected to them. Joy becomes a shared field rather than a competitive one. And through this connection, Fire types can extend their natural empathy outward to others—and inward to themselves.
They begin to realise:
- I don’t have to be perfect to be loved.
- I am one among many. We all long to belong.
- Being human is enough.
This is the gift of balanced Fire: the capacity to love, to be loved, and to find joy not in performance, but in presence.
A Simple Practice:
Next time you catch yourself comparing, pause.
- Notice the joy in someone else’s life.
- Breathe it in.
- Whisper inwardly: May your joy grow. May I celebrate with you.
And then, gently turn that same wish back toward yourself.
In the treatment room, working with the Fire element often involves creating safety for the heart—softening shame, encouraging expression, and helping patients reconnect with their innate worthiness. Through acupuncture and presence, we invite the Heart to feel held again.
If any of this resonates, or if you’re curious about how Five Element acupuncture can support emotional wellbeing, I’d love to hear from you.
With warmth and heart,
🔗 References / Further Reading
You can include these at the end of the blog or cite them if you wish:
- Brown, Brené. Atlas of the Heart. Penguin Random House, 2021.
- Brown, Brené. Daring Greatly. Avery, 2012.
- Ni, Maoshing. The Yellow Emperor’s Classic of Medicine. Shambhala, 1995.
- Wood, Lonny Jarrett. The Spirit of the Points: Five Element Acupuncture and the Energetics of Healing. 2020.
- Trungpa, Chögyam. Cutting Through Spiritual Materialism. Shambhala, 1973. (on joy and ego)
- The concept of mudita originates in Buddhist teachings; see Sharon Salzberg’s Lovingkindness: The Revolutionary Art of Happiness (1995) for a beautiful Western interpretation.
